Stream-of-Consciousness-PERKS STYLE.

22 Sep

After reading my dear friend Rachel’s confessions just now-I decided it was time to air out my own dirty laundry…

I’ve got so much floating around in my perky little pregnant brain-I’m not even sure where to begin. In fact-I’ll write this blog post stream-of-consciousness style to show you just how muddled one’s brain can become while mothering a toddler, being 21 weeks pregnant, juggling household duties, etc…

I could tell you about how Daddy Perks and I just celebrated our 3 year anniversary. But then I’d feel compelled to post pictures of my hottie husband and I together like I did last year, but that would require me to be “on top of things (blog and otherwise) and these days-I’m lucky to send the laundry through the wash cycle just once.

Which brings me to laundry. Ohhhhh the laundry. Moms-for the love of GOD, how do we stay on top of the laundry? I mean it! I want the secret and I WANT IT NOW. (Insert the tone Veruca Salt uses when she’s talking about wanting an oompa loompa.) But seriously-I can think of no other household chore I despise more. And that’s saying something. Because anyone who knows me-knows just how much I despise any and all household chores that don’t require a cold coke, cool ranch doritos, and a date with the couch while watching some trashy reality television. So while you’re sending me your secrets about laundry, go ahead and include your best tips for toilets, showers and any other scrubbing-related activities. These chores cause more heart palpitations and curse words to exit my mouth than should be allowed when you’ve got a learning-how-to-talk-and repeat-toddler around.

Speaking-of-that-toddler-who’s-learning-to-talk.  (Are y’all catching on to the stream-of-consciousness-esque post yet?)

Henry. Well he’s just delicious as usual. And there are countless pictures and stories to tell about my little man. So many that I’m once again having blogging anxiety thinking about how to organize the pictures, posts, and what-nots.

I could tell you about his first big-boy haircut, or his current obsession with musical instruments. Or I could gush about his smile, or his giggle.

Or-I could tell you that last week we found out Henry’s going to be a big brother to a little ______ .  But that would be SUCH an anti-climactic way to reveal the gender of Baby Perks # 2, wouldn’t it? I mean-at least Henry got an entire post dedicated to his gender reveal. And speaking of gender reveal. Wow!  After swapping stories with our OB last week at our 20 week appointment, I’ve decided that simple phone calls/texts to our loved ones just wan’t fancy enough compared to the ways some mommys-to-be are sharing their news. More on that later. (I’m also currently thinking about the fact that lots of my readers may already know the gender of my unborn child-and if any of you little stinkers write about it in the comments section-you’re in DEEP trouble.)

And then there’s the weddings. For which we’ve been attending a lot of lately. And for which I have another one this weekend. In Chicago. And I’m leaving the boys at home. So while I’m off to the windy city to celebrate with dear friends, Hank and Daddy Perks will be doing boy things-which I project will include a lot of football and this…

Which brings me to the basketball hoop. A birthday gift which Henry received for his first birthday. Can I tell you that we barely got through the door the night of Henry’s birthday party  a few weeks ago before Daddy Perks was ripping the box apart to put this together. Can we say the “gift that keeps on giving.” Or rather-the gift that was meant to be for my one year-old but will CLEARLY get more use out of it by my husband for years to come-maybe ever. For a few weeks this prized possession was set up in our family room. And whenever Daddy Perks had a free moment (or was late to work, couldn’t find matching socks, but somehow managed to get a last second shot off) you better believe he was shooting hoops-little tikes style. People. He’s DRIVING ME CRAZY. Because-he’s not just shooting the ball once or twice and then moving on to put the dishes in the dishwasher…

Oh no. He’s found about a million different shots that he’s spent the last few weeks perfecting. I’m talking shots that require multiple-bounces-of-the-wall-before-they-ever-touch-the-basket shots. I’m talking shots that require him to be shooting from our 2nd story loft down into the family room. And even worse-he’s enlisted ME to be apart of these crazy basketball shenanigans. Like-at least once a day he’s asking me to play PIG or HORSE with him.  And the worst part…I made the mistake of humoring him JUST ONCE-and we laughed and giggled like teenagers while playing. And now, he can’t understand why his 21 week pregnant wife doesn’t want to play PIG all the time. And Henry. Well, he loves the basketball hoop too. And while he’s just a wee-bit short to make baskets on his own yet…you better believe Daddy Perks has perfected two moves with his son.  1.) Picking Henry up and carrying him to the basket as he proudly watches his firstborn son drop the ball in. And 2.) He’s already taught Henry how to “fetch” the ball for him. And wouldn’t you figure…Henry has way more fun getting the ball for Daddy and watching him shoot.

So needless to say-I did a silent happy dance when Daddy Perks went on a cleaning binge the other day and decided that the basketball hoop needed to be put upstairs in Henry’s bedroom. HALLELUJAH. Is it me, or does the spelling of the word hallelujah look really weird?

I also can’t wait to share some family portraits the Perks family had done a few weeks ago. A friend of mine was kind enough to take us to a nearby park to get some great shots of our family. I wanted to make sure we had a nice family portrait done before our family-of-three becomes a family-of-four. (And also before I get really big and pregnant and don’t want to see a picture of myself from a mile away.)

The picture outing doubled as Henry’s one-year portraits as well…so while I’ll do an entire post to share lots of the pictures…here’s a sneak peak of our little man…

And quite frankly-I can’t think of a better way to end this wacky post-then with that picture.

The end.


7 Responses to “Stream-of-Consciousness-PERKS STYLE.”

  1. Erica September 22, 2010 at 7:37 am #

    Linz- you are hilarious! Love reading and getting to gear about all the “little” things going on! Love and miss you!

  2. Rinny September 22, 2010 at 12:10 pm #

    I hope I’m to blame for the fact that he likes musical instruments! Keep banging that drum, Henry 😉

  3. abs September 22, 2010 at 9:10 pm #

    hahah…. I needed a good laugh linz! that was too funny 🙂

    can’t wait to see all the family pics!

  4. Dawn Dwyer September 25, 2010 at 3:30 pm #

    Hey Lindsey! I was just doing a load of laundry and thought of you with a smile. I hate doing laundry too, and was feeling a little bitter about spending my free time on such a task. Then it occurred to me that there are millions upon millions of people who don’t have the luxury of automatic machines or clean water to have clean clothes. The thought sort of startled me, and I don’t me to be a downer here, but it made me realize that I had a lot for which to be grateful. My goal (which is often unmet) is to put a load in each morning and evening, so that I complete one full load each day. But my new goal is to whisper a prayer of thanks while I am doing it.

  5. Tiff September 28, 2010 at 1:32 am #

    Girl, I love your “muddled” brain! Let’s see….I’ll touch on a little bit of everything b/c well, believe it or not, I actually have a few minutes lol!

    Laundry – I’m def with ya there. And thanks to Dawn for the reminder that yes we are very blessed to have such a luxery as automatic machines. Considering mine aren’t employed near as often as they need to be, I can only imagine if I had to do it all by hand! (And how in the WORLD do people with 3+ kids stay on top of the laundry!)

    Please tell Daddy Perks and Henry to bring that goal down this way and we’ll have a full court bball court set up in the basement and can have a real game! I’m glad my hubby isn’t the only one that reverts back to middle school games on that thing!

    I would be lying if I said I wasn’t anxiously awaiting some pregnancy posts! I really thought your next post would be all about finding out the sex of (insert whatever nickname it has been decided fits Baby Perks #2). {And if there’s anyone reading this that doesn’t already know….I do hahahaha!}

    Oh, weddings! They are fun, aren’t they!

    And last, but certainly not least, I am LOVING Lil’ Man! Look at those eyes! I could eat him for days!

  6. Sallie September 28, 2010 at 9:30 am #

    New reader- found you from Babbling Abby! Totally enjoy your posts- you are so whitty and crack me up. So excited for your #2 Perk- but am DYING to know what you are having 🙂 Can’t wait for that post!

  7. Kristin Brown September 30, 2010 at 1:15 pm #

    Ok seriously momma…where is a blog update?! I want to hear about your girls weekend and although I know the gender of your little bug, I want you to announce it!! Also, can we please get together soon?! I have some pictures I want to show you..and um i just miss you ;)!!

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