Shake What Your Mama (And Daddy) Gave Ya…

24 Mar

As a first-time-Mommy-to-be…my mind is constantly wandering about the impending arrival of our little one.  It’s hard not to let your thoughts be consumed by the reality that in a few short months another human will literally turn my world upside down.  (In a good way of course!)  Part of the exciting anticipation of Baby Perks’ arrivial is imagining what traits and characteristics our bambino will inherit from each of us.  Assuming we don’t have one of those awkward “must have been the milkman’s baby” or “did we take home the right baby from the hospital?” situations…(you know what I’m talking about right?  Those babies that look NOTHING like thier parents.  The ones that literally have everyone whispering and thinking… “this can’t be their kid-can it?”)  Well-assuming we bequeath the the good, the bad, and the ugly to our little one…here’s what I’m hoping he/she gets from each us.  And also, here’s what I’m certain he/she’s bound to have whether they like it or not…

*The thickest/waviest hair OF ALL TIME.  This is a trait that’s not even in question.  If you know Mommy and Daddy Perks, then you know this baby is destined to have “a head of hair.”  In fact, the hubby and I giggle about it often-thinking “Holy moly-our kid is screwed.”  They’re either gonna be summoned by Loreal for shampoo commercials (best case scenario) OR be the laughing stock of the school because they’ve got the type of fro that just ain’t meant for a white kid (worst case scenario.)  *Point of reference…for those of you thinking-Mommy Perks-you’ve got great hair…PLEASE know that I was COMPLETELY bald until the age of 2.  No-not 2 months old, 2 YEARS old.  That’s right people…the girl you know and love with the thick, wavy, donate-to-Locks-of-Love head of hair, was rockin’ the bald look for the first two years of my life.  Sometimes good things come to those who wait.

*We know he/she WON’T have brown eyes.  According to my (very little) knowledge of recessive genetics, it’s impossible for two parents with blue eyes to have a baby with brown eyes.  (If I’m being 100% accurate, Daddy Perks actually has one blue eye and one “depends on the day/what color shirt he’s wearing” eye.  It bounces between blue, green and hazel.  So correct me if I’m wrong all you doctors out there…but I’m pretty sure I’ll be falling in love with Baby Perks’ baby blues…

*I’m hoping  praying Baby Perks’ gets my skin tone.  No offense Daddy Perks, you’ve got a lovely complexion-but unless our kid wants to bathe in SPF 50 at all times, I’m hoping he/she inherits my ability to soak up the sun and be outside for longer than 7 minutes before his or her skin suffers 3rd degree burns on a rainy day.  

*I know Daddy Perks has to be praying that our little one does NOT inherit my volume control issues.  (You’re thinking…define “volume control issues.”)  Well, how do I put this?  Frankly-I’m loud.  It’s been an ongoing challenge for anyone who has had the esteemed pleasure of being around me-ever.  (I’ll take this moment to apologize to anyone who has ever had to live with me…my husband, parents, siblings, college roommates, my upstair neighbors, etc.)   Let me try to explain.   When I was in high school my bedroom was in the basement and I’d be talking on the phone when I’d hear my parents yell from their bedroom (on the second floor of the house) “Can you please LOWER your voice?  The rest of the house does not want or need to hear your latest breakdown of yesterday’s Dawson’s Creek episode.”  Is that pitiful or what?  When I did my student teaching-my advisor had one (and ONLY one) bit of  “constructive criticism” she lent me…”Well, when you’re teaching dear, you might want to try and monitor your volume-you’re a bit loud. It’s alright honey, when I was teaching,  I often had trouble turning off my teacher voice too.”  To which I rolled my eyes thinking a.) when do you ever need to “lower your voice” in a room full of 7 year-olds, and b.) Lady-that ain’t my “teacher voice”-that’s just my god-given vocals-I’ve been talking at that octive since I learned to babble in the first place.  

*Here’s to hoping our kid has a good ol’ fashioned case of the funnies.  We love to laugh in the Perks household.  It’s really a MUST that our child be giggling as he/she exits the womb.  I can’t imagine having a kid who doesn’t love a good belly laugh as much as we do.  I’d be thrilled if Baby Perks’ inherits Daddy’s ability to make people laugh.  It’s one (of a million) reasons that I love and adore my husband.  He’s absolutely hysterical and although I sometimes refrain from laughing at his jokes (somebody has to keep him grounded) he truly was brought on this earth to make people laugh.  He’s incredibly talented and disgustingly witty, and I’d be proud to have our child get every bit of his/her funnies from Daddy.

Ok Baby Perks-make a mental note of each of these.  We’re counting on you to get the best of our best.

3 Responses to “Shake What Your Mama (And Daddy) Gave Ya…”

  1. Bethany March 24, 2009 at 9:25 am #

    I think you’re right about the blue-eye thing. Both my hubby and I have blues and so do our daughters. In fact, I think having two blue-eyed parents makes the baby’s eyes even a DEEPER BLUE! At least that’s our case 🙂

    I’m wondering about the hair thing. I too share your super thick, wavy, fast growing, great textured hair and have yet to see the same in my girls. Don’t get me wrong, both of them have great hair, just not thick yet. Wonder when that gene kicks in!!!

  2. Rachie March 24, 2009 at 3:50 pm #

    Love this post. Very creative:). I think Baby Perks will def have blue eyes. And be funny. And I hope he’s as loving as you are, Shubz. Y’all have some major triple threats going on!!!

  3. Cait March 25, 2009 at 11:40 am #

    Gosh Linz- I am hysterical over this post! I can totally feel ya with being bald until the toddler age and then it (fro strands) definitely made up for lost time!

    Can’t wait to see how the genes of the bambino play out!!

    So jealous of your sun baking action coming up! Catch some rays for all of us!


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